5 Reasons Why You "Story Stalk"
It’s 7 a.m. and your alarm goes off. Before getting out of bed, you scroll through your latest social media feed and begin clicking on miscellaneous people’s stories. Next thing you know, it’s 7:15 and you realize you’ve just spent/ wasted 15 minutes of your morning consuming your following’s last 24 hours. Why do we get so caught up in story stalking?
Story
Sto•ry
/ˈstôrē/
Most popularly used on Snapchat and Instagram to capture a moment in one’s life to be showcased to their social media following for a 24 hour period of time.
Stalk
/stôk/
hound, spy, solicitation for a certain kind of information
1. It’s easier than actually building a real connection
We’ve all met that someone you hit it off with the first night you meet. This someone could be a new friend or a potential love interest. You make all these grand plans together in person and decide to exchange numbers and Instagram handles. After that night you never hear from that person again, but you both are watching each other’s stories on a regular basis. It’s easier for you and a hell of a lot less effort to be their IG friend than anything else. Earlier this year I found myself in a similar situation. It was 2 a.m. on New Year’s and I had spent a good portion of my night dancing with a guy I had met at this Lower East Side venue. At the end of the night we exchanged numbers. We had such a fun time together that I was 100% sure I’d hear from him again. At 3 p.m. the next day I get a Snapchat request. Strange, because he had to use my number to find my Snapchat handle, but okay. The entire day goes by. No text. No call. At this point I had written him off because he was either a) in a relationship and added me on the one social media account where messages disappear or b) lazy AF. Either case, he was “nexted.” Months later, and he still views all my stories.
2. You want to live vicariously thru your Instagram muses
Whether you’re intrigued because of their sense of fashion, their travel experiences, their workout routines, their cooking abilities, or their blog (wink wink), you can’t help but wonder what their everyday life is like. *NEWSFLASH* Instagram stories can be just as skewed as someone’s profile. One of my friends made a comment to me a few months ago about my always being out. She was surprised to hear I was in on a Friday night (which is not a rare occurrence for me btw). “I feel like you’re always out.” She was referencing the many stories she had seen of me out and living my NYC night life. At the end of the day, we all share the parts of our lives we want to share with the world. Just because I don’t post selfies of myself in bed on a Friday night so people know I stayed in, doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.
3. You’re either crushing or just not over them
We’ve all been there. For those of us who are not married, engaged, having babies and or posting photos from our puppy gender reveal, we’ve been there PLENTY of times. Maybe there’s that one person you always wanted to “shoot your shot” with or maybe you just broke up with your boyfriend or girlfriend and while it was mutual, you still feel some type of way about not talking to them every day like you used to. Instead of itching your urge to reach out to them, you watch his or her stories on the regular. Because you have an ounce of self-respect for yourself, you decide to wait a few hours after each story so that it doesn’t look you’re “story stalking” when you actually are. Now, story stalking isn’t one sided. Not only do you watch this person’s stories, you also post your own (sometimes specifically for this reason) to see if that person still watches yours. It’s sickening, yet the majority of us have all done it. Side note: If you want to take your story stalking to the next level, there are apps now that allow you to watch anyone with a public profile anonymously. You can thank me later.
4. Your ego needs a boost
While some of us look at our ex flings’ stories because we’re not over them, there comes a point in time where we do look at them to stroke our own egos. This doesn’t just apply to ex’s, this could also be old friends from high school, someone who bullied you as a child, coworkers, etc. “Whew Tony put on weight since I last saw him.” “Ha, Samantha’s new boyfriend is short AF.” “Corey still ain’t shit.” “Bro, Jason works at McDonalds.” “Brittany still wears those raggedy ass shoes she wore three years ago.” Any of these sound familiar?
5. You suffer from a serious case of FOMO
It’s Saturday night and you’re stuck at your Aunt Jackie’s cat’s 6th birthday party. All of your friends are at a rooftop bar downtown and it’s killing you to know people are having fun without you. You anxiously click thru each friend’s story while periodically tapping back to re watch closely enough to see who all is in attendance, what everyone is drinking, what music is playing, and what they’re all wearing.
Once you've accepted the fact that at least one of the above applies to you, don’t be ashamed. Story stalking knows no color, no gender and no age. We all suffer from it.
Even after reading this, we all know you're going to continue to story stalk and that's okay too.
-B