An Open Letter to All the Men Who Have Ever Screwed Us Over

To Man It May Concern,

Let's keep this brief.

Do us all a favor and actually be sorry and mean it. I don't mean some lazy ass text with a bogus excuse or an additional lie. Have enough respect for us to acknowledge your wrongdoings and provide us with the most heartfelt apology imaginable. While in the moment we may still be mad, we will naturally forgive you eventually (not to be confused with forgetting nor taking your ass back) because we are empathetic creatures.

Second, do not attempt to get us back and come back into our lives when you know you have no intention of changing your behavior. It’s really that simple. Provide your heartfelt apology and keep it moving at 100 mph. Stop (un)intentially “breadcrumbing” us.

“Breadcrumbing: the act of sending out flirtatious, but non-committal text messages (ie “breadcrumbs”) in order to lure a sexual partner without expending much effort”

Skip the ”I want to be friends act”. We know that's man code for “let me keep her around just in case”. When you think about texting us seconds, minutes, days, weeks, or months later, absolutely do not. When you think about calling, don’t. When you think about randomly dropping by, don’t. When you think about responding to our IG story, don’t. Keep those Happy Birthday wishes in draft. We need you to ignore your ”I sense her being happy” radar! Let us mourn you and let us heal without you. We will venture on to bigger and better thangs. Trust us.

Lastly and most importantly, understand the long term effect your actions have on us and think twice before doing it again to someone else. Each and every one of you leaves an imprint on our minds (you know we overthink!) and our hearts. We carry it all on our backs in our future romantic endeavors and boy, that shit gets heavy! You're making it that much harder for the man that comes after you. Remember, one day you may meet the woman of your dreams and she may have a lot of baggage to unpack. Don’t blame her. You can thank your friend, Tyrone (let's hope you all get this Erykah Badu reference).

Best Wishes,

-B

A member of the tired of being screwed over female population